Gwyneth Paltrow Gives Birth to Baby Moses

This week is Semana Santa, which of course, the week when Santa sends all of his hot jizz down on all of the good girls and boys. I don't have to walk dogs this week, so I'm trying to use up the rest of the hours available on this 10-hour Internet ticket that I bought. I'm also attempting to regrow huge sideburns now that I have a job and don't have to attempt to look somewhat clean-shaven.
After spending all of our free time for the past number of weeks looking for apartments, we have found two that might work out. One is being rented by a woman who is Spanish, but has lived in Texas for 30 years. So she is more than a bit insane. She's very concerned about who is going to live in which room and where we are going to theoretically put bikes, even though we don't have any bikes yet. She's also living there until May 2, so we can't move in before then. She also agreed to rent it to some Spanish guy that she doesn't like, but now the both of them are reconsidering.
The second place is bigger, closer to the center, and has a small balcony. It's slightly more expensive, but it's worth it. We can also move in on the 15th of April. Neither one of these places is definite, but the bigger one said it wouldn't be a problem provided we had the money and pay stubs and the crazy woman said that it's fine as long as the other guy doesn't want it.
What is the point of all this? The point is that I am going to scream and rip people's still-beating hearts out of their chests if I have to spend another week or god knows how long looking at more apartments.